OUUCCCHHHH!!

THEY WERE MEAN!!! I should have been real suspicious when Mommy busted me out of Baby Jail early today. First, I had to wait for my early afternoon food fest because Mommy got there while my bottle was warming up. Then she puts me in the car and drives off. The whole time she was acting as if the two of us were just going to hang out and get some extra cuddling. Did that happen??? NO!!! (Well not at that exact moment in time anyway). So she takes me into the doctor's office, checks us in and then takes us to the waiting room. I should have figured out that it was going to be BAD since Daddy wasn't there to meet us. For all I knew, something could have been wrong with Daddy. Mommy was entertaining me when I heard a lady call my name. Then it hit me, we were there for ME! So they take me back to the back and make me take off my clothes! There I sat in my diaper. How embarrassing! I screamed because I knew something bad was about to happen. Just then, Daddy walked in the door and I was absolutely certain that it really was going to be bad!

So Mommy and the nurse carry me off and make me lay down on the scale. Ladies, I am not meat! I don't need to be on a meat scale. Anyway, Mommy and Daddy both smile when they see I am 13 lbs and 5 ounces. Not bad for a boy who wasn't feeling good last week! Oh yeah, I am suppose to be upset right now...So they carry me back to the room where I finally get my bottle. Then the doctor comes in. All that man ever does is poke and prod me! They measured my head and my body. My head is 15 5/8 inches and I am 24 3/8 inches long. Well ahead of my age group! I had to smile at that news. Mommy said I shouldn't get too excited because this may be the only time I am the tallest boy in my age group.

The doctor then wanted to check my mouth out. Lucky for him I was holding it wide open for him! He finally told Mommy that she could pick me up and comfort me. Well, that was extremely rude because he then sent the nurse in with four ENORMOUS NEEDLES! She then proceeded to stab me twice in both legs! Mommy couldn't bear to watch, so Daddy stood over me while Mommy peeked at me over his shoulder! Can you believe it, Daddy just stood there an let that lady STAB me FOUR TIMES!!! I went nuts when the lady did that. Come to think of it, just the memory of it makes me want to scream all over again. Mommy finally got me to settle down by assuring me that just as soon as I settled down we could get out of there! So what did I do?? I am no fool, I settled down and we got out of there!

My new food seems to be doing the job. The doctor says that I can go back to using the first one he switched me to last week, which is cheaper. The doctor thinks all babies should be on my new stuff but it's just so expensive. While Mommy and Daddy are going to try me again on the formula he put me on last week, Mommy says she is perfectly happy giving me the stuff that I am on now because at least that way, she knows I am doing well on it. Why mess with my system just to save a few dollars??

Oh yeah, in case I didn't mention it before. They moved my crib at Baby Jail. I don't get to hang out next to McKenzie all day anymore. Guess who's big head I get to look at all day??? Yup, you guessed it...Charles. Mommy is making it a point though to make sure she places me in the crib each morning where I can stare at McKenzie. Mommy can't guarantee that I get to see McKenzie's pretty little face all day but at least she tries!

I get to go to Kay Care again tomorrow so I can tell her and Uncle Carl all about today's trauma. Ms. Charlotte is going to clobber Daddy for busting me out of Baby Jail twice in one week!

Well that is all for now. Oh yeah, Where's Joey??

P.S. Auntie Norma is FIRED!!! Auntie Norma, Mommy told me to tell you something about BEEs but I can't spell it correctly. She says you will know what she is talking about. HA! HA!

Ahh!!!! Now That Feels Better!!

Well, something has to be said for high dollar food because I sure feel a whole heck of a lot better! So far so good but let's keep our fingers crossed for good measure! Mommy and Daddy are very very happy with my new food too. I am not too fond of the taste but I am sure I will learn to devour it in vast quantities like my old stuff.

Daddy took care of me Friday night and most of Saturday because Mommy was sick! She can't blame me for making her sick though because we had different illnesses. She got better Saturday night though!

Mommy had to laugh at Daddy because I woke up at 4 a.m. this morning. Mommy asked Daddy if he wanted to get up now or get up when I woke up at 5:30. Mommy explained to him that if he chose the latter he wouldn't be going back to bed. I think he thought she was lying because he chose the latter. Ha! Ha! He won't be doing that again. Just as well though because Mommy got to sleep in. Well, if you call sleeping until 8 sleeping in.

Today I went shopping with Mommy and Daddy. I think Mommy found the secret to taking me shopping...take impatient Daddy with us to the store! I don't think Daddy should be allowed to go with us anymore because I don't get nearly enough goodies when he is there. Anyhow, they got me a portable playpen so I have a comfortable place to sleep when I take breaks at work. It also comes with a full size bassinet but Mommy says I will probably only get a couple uses out it at my age. There is a play mat with gym that came with it too so I can get exercise breaks at work. I also got an activity time surfboard playmat that has floating fishes in it for me to squash. Cowabunga Dudes!!!!!

Back to Baby Jail tomorrow but I get to go to work Tuesday because Mommy has a dentist appointment Tuesday. Mommy also says I may be able to go to work on Thursday depending on how I am feeling after my doctor's appointment Wednesday. I wonder what the doctor is going to do to me that Mommy is planning the possibility of me going to work on Thursday?? Hmm...maybe I should be suspicious.

Well that is all for now. Oh yeah, Where's Joey??

Oh My Goodness, It Costs An Arm and A Leg!!!

Just a little update on my condition. Daddy carried my diaper to the doctor today! Ewwww! Anyway, the doctor decided to switch my formula again. I started my new formula tonight so let's keep our fingers crossed. Mommy says I have to get a better paying job to help buy my food because it costs twice as much as the old stuff. I told her that it was her problem not mine. So what did she say?? She said okie dokie!! She just took all the fun out of tormenting her by agreeing to cover any costs whatsoever concerning my food. What a party pooper she is! Anyway, let's hope the doctor got it right this time.

Auntie Norma and Uncle Jerry stopped by last night. I slept the whole time they were here. As predicted, I woke up just as soon as they backed out of the drive way. That serves them right!

I did very well at daycare today. I didn't have any problems at all and I was very active, alert and ate everything they shoved my way! Despite that Mommy says I still have to eat the high dollar stuff. Mommy has pretty good eyes, I reckon she should because she has four of them. She saw me up on the changing table from her care. Ms. Charlotte saw her too and told me she was making her way to me. Mommy may need to have a less conspicuous car so she can sneak up on them!


Well that's all for now! Oh yeah, Where's Joey??

Chubsy Ubsy!!

Mommy and Daddy took me to the doctor today because my tummy ache wasn't getting much better. I laughed when Mommy told me that this was the first time since May 2001 that she called in sick!! Mommy was suspicious that my formula was the cause of my problem. The doctor seems to think so too since I haven't been running a temperature or having other problems. He gave Mommy some new food for me to try. Hopefully it will do the trick because I am was getting bored with of getting my diaper changed and a new set of clothes. The doctor even asked Mommy if she happened to have one of my dirty diapers with her. Ewwwww!! Mommy didn't and really didn't think he would want one. Guess vets and doctors aren't much different after all! Anyway, today is my first day on my new food, so lets see how it goes.

Mommy was worried that I may be underweight since I have been having a rough couple days. HA!! I am above average for my age. I weigh 13.1 lbs!! Daddy was very proud with my weight and the doctor says I am thriving. I am a big boy and if Charles doesn't keep his slobbery hands off my stuff I am going to roll over on to him because Mommy says I am bigger than him and a whole lot cuter (Mommy assures me that she is not biased). I have to go back to the doctor next week though so the doctor can do my well baby check up!

I went to Kay Care after we left the doctor's office and I earned $15!! I must be doing a real good job at work because I either got a pay raise or bonus! Ain't life grand? Well that is all for now. Oh yeah, Where's Joey?? (Aunt Lili you really need to come see me soon)

Crime Solved!!

Okay, update time! Sunday, Aunt Kay and Uncle Carl came by for a visit. They brought me presents!!! Even without presents, they are the best godparents a boy can have! Well, except when Uncle Carl tried to cheat me when we were playing black jack. That wasn't one of his finer godfather moments. They thought it was really funny to watch how I reacted to my Baby Mozart DVD!

Yesterday, Mommy inquired about my stolen outfit at Baby Jail. Guess what??? I was right, my outfit was in Charles' bag. That scoundrel! I was a little bit sick at daycare yesterday but they didn't call Mommy because I wasn't running a temperature, just a little tummy ache. Mommy made it all better when we got home.

I was up and running full speed today! I was just full of smiles and laughs for Mommy this morning. I was such a good boy at Baby Jail today that they gave me a sticker on my release papers!! Mommy told Ms. Charlotte that I would not be in Baby Jail for the whole day tomorrow because Daddy is taking me to Kay Care. Ms. Charlotte said that Aunt Kay and Uncle Carl can't have me because I am hers! Dream on Ms. Charlotte!!! However, I do have to admit, they really do know how to take really good care of the prisoners on their watch! When Mommy and I got outside of Baby Jail, I spied Uncle Fester waiting to say hi to me in the parking lot. He was working so we couldn't really hang out. He just wanted to say hi to me and make sure I got safely locked into my car seat base. What an Uncle!!

Tonight, Daddy said that Aunt Kay and Uncle Carl have ordered a whole bunch of puppets so they can put on a puppet show for me. I can't wait. Mommy told Daddy that if he doesn't take pictures of my puppet show he is going to be in BIG trouble!! Well that is all for now. Oh yeah, Where's Joey?? Ha! I love saying that!

Someone Call The Police!! I Have Been Robbed!!

When Mommy dropped me off at Baby Jail this past Friday I was wearing a really cool outfit but when Mommy picked me up, I was wearing one of my reserves. Mommy asked them for my outfit but it was nowhere to be found. Can you believe it, they stole the clothes right off my back!!! Ms. Chris says that Ms. Charlotte probably put it in the wash, so we will see Monday if they give me back my clothes. If not, I am calling the prosecuting attorney's office to file charges. I bet you it was Charles!!

I finally heard from Joey!! With any luck I will see him real soon! (Hint Aunt Lili!) Today Aunt Kay and Uncle Carl are suppose to be coming by to see me. Next weekend Grandma Dale and Grandpa Jim are coming to stay the night with me. I can't wait to cuddle with Grandma and make faces with Grandpa.

Somebody Get Me A Chisel!!

Yesterday Daddy busted me out of Baby Jail and I went to work with him. Aunt Kay and Uncle Carl took real good care of me. For some reason though, I didn't get paid yesterday for all my hard work. They did discover the money I was hiding in my sock that was being stored in my diaper bag. Don't they know that a guy always has to have an emergency stash of cash on hand. Heck, I may want to buy a girl a bottle of milk!

Mommy dropped me off at Baby Jail again today. It still makes Mommy sad to drop me off! I wish Daddy would have busted me out of Baby Jail again today because baby Charles is nothing but trouble! He is such a baby! Can you believe that I had to wait in line behind Charles to get some food??? Ms. Chris knows I can do a lot of damage to a bottle real quick, so when Charles wanted his bottle she should have woke me up to let me eat before that slow poke!! If I had a chisel, I could bust my way out of Baby Jail and scoot on over to Uncle Lenny's and Aunt Patty's house where I can help myself to some grub. Uncle Lenny just leave me a key under the mat!

I finally got to see Aunt Patty tonight. Mommy took me over there after she liberated me from Baby Jail. It was a long drive there...It must have taken a whole thirty seconds to get there! I got to see Uncle Lenny too but I was happier to see Aunt Patty than I was Uncle Lenny. No offense Uncle Lenny but it just wasn't your turn but I will give you my full attention this weekend if you stop by.

Well that is all for now. Oh yeah, Where's Joey??