Guess what??? Some little punk attacked me at school!!! When Mommy picked me up today she saw that I had a Ouch Report waiting for her. The note said that I was bitten by some little punk (my words not the wardens). The Warden couldn't tell Mommy who bit me so I did the only thing that was acceptable...I ratted that little punk out for biting me. I think I had to push Mommy's eyes back into their sockets when she realized the little punk who bit me was the same punk who got kicked out of the penitentiary one year ago to be exact for the very same offense. He bit me and everyone else last year and had to go to a different penitentiary but they let him back into mine a little while ago. Mommy had a few words with the Assistant Warden about me being maliciously attacked by a known predator. I am the second boy he bit since he has been back. Daddy and Mommy are contemplating sending me to a new school (I wonder if they have room at Carter's new school) so that I won't get bit by Jaws anymore. Just so everyone knows, Mommy and Daddy are realists---they realize I am going to get bitten every now and then but they shouldn't be being handed out by the same offender, especially one that was kicked to the curb before for the same offense. How many other innocent victims will he attack??? For all of those who know my true ways----the Warden assured Mommy that the attack was unprovoked!!!
Mommy says that if someone bites me again I am allowed to "smash" them. I assured Mommy though that I don't smash people, cars or trains because it is not nice. That made Mommy happy to know that I truly am a good boy who doesn't think it is nice to "smash" other kids regardless of the reason. Mommy's smile didn't last long when she realized that eventually her sweet angel baby boy will eventually adopt a different opinion about smashing bullies!! However, I think she will enjoy me being a perfect angel while I am one. Now that I think of it, could she ever possibly think of me any other way???
Since I was being a stool pigeon today, I decided to rat Daddy out for refusing to buy me donuts this morning. I told Mommy that Daddy was mean and that we should call the po-lice for denying me donuts!! Funny how I thought of the po-lice in my conversation with Mommy about donuts!!! Anyway, I don't think Mommy thought the deprivation of donuts wasn't a serious enough of an offense to warrant involving the po-lice. This time at least!!!
Well that is all for now. Oh wait, no it is not!!! I have to give a shout out to My Jessica! She graduated from high school today (even if it was Bryant) with an honors tassel. She sure is setting a good example for me! Way to go Jessica!!!
Mommy says that if someone bites me again I am allowed to "smash" them. I assured Mommy though that I don't smash people, cars or trains because it is not nice. That made Mommy happy to know that I truly am a good boy who doesn't think it is nice to "smash" other kids regardless of the reason. Mommy's smile didn't last long when she realized that eventually her sweet angel baby boy will eventually adopt a different opinion about smashing bullies!! However, I think she will enjoy me being a perfect angel while I am one. Now that I think of it, could she ever possibly think of me any other way???
Since I was being a stool pigeon today, I decided to rat Daddy out for refusing to buy me donuts this morning. I told Mommy that Daddy was mean and that we should call the po-lice for denying me donuts!! Funny how I thought of the po-lice in my conversation with Mommy about donuts!!! Anyway, I don't think Mommy thought the deprivation of donuts wasn't a serious enough of an offense to warrant involving the po-lice. This time at least!!!
Well that is all for now. Oh wait, no it is not!!! I have to give a shout out to My Jessica! She graduated from high school today (even if it was Bryant) with an honors tassel. She sure is setting a good example for me! Way to go Jessica!!!
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